Another mistake is a long list of descriptions of the setting. Rather than giving two pages of description of the mountains and rivers and architectural styles, choose the right places throughout the story to pepper these items.
That small window for profits is all-important to the Mayor in Jaws. His job depends upon getting re-elected and in turn that chance for re-election depends not upon keeping the population at full number, but on making sure those cash register ring and ring throughout the summer season. That, in a nutshell, is what Marxist critique is all about; following the money and finding how economics drives the narrative.
Her stories noticeably have a veneer of normalcy to them, taking place in small town America and involving people of no particularly unusual talents. But lying not terribly deep beneath that veneer there is usually an unsettling and grotesque mockery of accepted institutions.